Santa’s Bureau of Investigation, Day 7

Posted: December 7, 2007 in Uncategorized
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From a Dec 7 memo filed by Tinsel Enlights, Santa’s Internal Affairs agent:

The informant, codenamed “Deep Sleigh”, claims to have personally observed Subject A, codenamed “Magician”, having secret discussions with Subject B, codenamed “Berry”.  “Deep Sleigh” claims “Berry” may have ordered unauthorized SBI operations, notably the recently compromised operation in Ohio, codenamed “Bumblebee”, which may have had negative effects.  In particular, relentless reports on “Bumblebee” have sown widespread mistrust in Santa, which could put Christmas itself  at risk if public opinion continues to turn against us. 

Pursuant to SBI code 46.35-r38nw.4, I have no choice but to recommend cleaners be deployed to eradicate evidence of “Bumblebee”, and Santa’s Spin Squad refocus their efforts on “Bumblebee” while the damage can still be contained.  While it is unfortunate that the NBS network chose to associate the “Bumblebee” operation with “A Day That Will Live in Infamy”, I am confident that public opinion can be fully restored to pre-“Bumblebee” levels in the next 10-14 days, so that Christmas can proceed on schedule without the need to involve Santa’s Sleigh Operations HQ.

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